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Musyoki Kitetu
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Musyoki Kitetu

Musyoki Kitetu

@Dagoh
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98 Following
30 Followers
21 posts
Male
16-12-2000
Living in Kenya
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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

This bloke went into a nightclub and saw a gorgeous honey sitting by herself at the bar, he asked her to dance. She agreed and they took to the dance floor for a slow one. While they were cheek to cheek, the guy said, "You really smell terrific. What's that you have on?"The flattered girl told him it was Chanel #5. Then wanting to return the compliment, she said, "You smell good, too. What is it that you have on?""Well, I've got a hardon, but I didn't think you could smell it," the guy replied.
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Eric Rugo

Nice one

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Eric Rugo

Great

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Eric Rugo

Knowledge seen

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Impossible!

A 90 year old man, who married an 18 year old young girl, went to see a doctor:OLD MAN: My 18 year wife is pregnant, your opinion doctor?DOCTOR: OK. Let me tell you a story. A hunter in a hurry, grabs an umbrella instead of a gun. He moves into the jungle, sees a lion, lifts the umbrella, pulls the handle & BANG! The lion drops dead!OLD MAN: That's impossible, someone else must have shot the lion.DOCTOR: There goes the answer to your question.
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Eric Rugo

Knowledge

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Impossible!

A 90 year old man, who married an 18 year old young girl, went to see a doctor:OLD MAN: My 18 year wife is pregnant, your opinion doctor?DOCTOR: OK. Let me tell you a story. A hunter in a hurry, grabs an umbrella instead of a gun. He moves into the jungle, sees a lion, lifts the umbrella, pulls the handle & BANG! The lion drops dead!OLD MAN: That's impossible, someone else must have shot the lion.DOCTOR: There goes the answer to your question.
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Eric Rugo

Great

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

A very very rich gentleman dies,leaving his fortune to his only living friends, a Doctor, a CEO, and a Lawyer. But being the eccentric he was, his will stipulated that each one must place their third of the money in his coffin before he is put in his final resting place. The funeral comes and goes. Over a year later the three friends are talking over lunch and the topic of the old man and his strange ways comes into the conversation. The Doctor finally says "I have to be honest, I didn't place ALL of the money into his coffin, I kept five million". Then the CEO states "Well, I have to admit that I too kept some of the cash. Ten million to be exact". The Lawyer glares at the two and says "I am ASHAMED of you two, I wrote a check for the FULL amount!"
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Eric Rugo

Nice one

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

A Lawyer Tries To Trick A Chinese Doctor Into Giving Him $100

A Chinese doctor can't find a job in a hospital in the US, so he opens a clinic and puts a sign outside that reads "GET TREATMENT FOR $20 - IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100."

An American lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic.

Lawyer: "I have lost my sense of taste."

Chinese: "Nurse, bring medicine from box No. 22 and put 3 drops in patient's mouth."

Lawyer: "Ugh. this is kerosene."

Chinese: "Congrats, your sense of taste is restored. Give me $20."

The annoyed lawyer goes back after a few days to recover his money.

Lawyer: "I have lost my memory. I cannot remember anything."

Chinese: "Nurse, bring medicine from box no. 22 and put 3 drops in his mouth."

Lawyer (annoyed): "This is kerosene. You gave this to me last time for restoring my taste."

Chinese: "Congrats. You got your memory back. Give me $20."

The fuming lawyer pays him, and then comes back a week later determined to get back $100.

Lawyer: "My eyesight has become very weak I can't see at all."

Chinese: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that, so take this $100."

Lawyer (staring at the note): "But this is $20, not $100!!"

Chinese: "Congrats, your eyesight is restored. Give me $20"
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

So the elephant says to the naked man . . ."You breathe through that little thing?"
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Wife: I wish I was a newspaper so I would be in ur hands allday. Husband: I too wish that u were a newspapers so I could have a new one everyday.
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Husband asks: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means... Without Information, Fighting Everytime! WIFE says: No darling , it means :- With Idiot For Ever
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

What's the matter here,,,,Naivasha is almost filling up

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. "I'm sorry sir, but I am blind, and can't read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer, I'll smell it and order from there. " A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man's table and hands it to him. The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath. "Ah, yes that's what I'll have, meatloaf and mashed potatoes. " Unbelievable, the owner says to himself as he walks towards the kitchen. The cook happens to be the owner's wife and he tells her what had just happened. The blind man eats his meal and leaves. Several days later the blind man returns and the owner mistakingly brings him a menu again. "Sir, remember me? I'm the blind man. "I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. I'll go get you a dirty fork. " The owner again retrieves a dirty fork and brings it to the blind man. After another deep breath, the blind man says, "That smells great, I'll take the Macaroni and cheese with broccoli. Once again walking away in disbelief,the owner thinks the blind man is screwing around with him and tells his wife that the next time the blind man comes in he's going to test him. The blind man eats and leaves. He returns the following week, but this time the owner sees him coming and runs to the kitchen. He tells his wife, "Mary rub this fork on your panties before I take it to the blind man. " Mary complies and hands her husband the fork back. As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner is ready and waiting. "Good afternoon sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you. " The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff and says, "Hey I didn't know that Mary worked here? "
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Husband to wife: Today is a fine day.

Next day he says: Today is a fine day.

Again next day, he says same thing: Today is a fine day.

Finally after a week, the wife can't take it and asks her husband: Since one week, you are saying this 'Today is a fine day'. I am fed up. What's the matter?

Husband: Last week when we had an argument, you said, 'I will leave you one fine day.' I was just trying to remind you.
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Job Problem

Akpos is coming back from work. As he enters the sitting room, his wife asked:
WIFE: Darling! Why are you looking so sad?
AKPOS: Sweetheart, I have a problem at my office.
WIFE: Don't say you have a problem. You should say we have a problem because we are now married.
AKPOS: OK, we have a problem in our office.
WIFE: And what is the problem darling?
AKPOS: Our secretary is pregnant for us.
WIFE: Whaaat!!!The wife fainted!
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

SMS Message

There was a girl Akpos really loved but he never had the guts to tell her how much he loves her. One night, at around 11pm, he summoned some courage and sent her an sms message saying, "I love you so much, I wanna date you. Please reply and tell me how you feel about me." A few seconds later he received a message alert on his phone. He was so scared and too tensed to open it that night, so he decided not to check the reply until the next morning when he will be less tensed. When he woke up the next day, he said his prayers, did his morning chores, brushed his teeth, ate his breakfast, took his bath and combed his hair, then jumped back to his bed and gently picked up his phone to read the message. So he started reading:"Dear customer you have insufficient balance to complete your request. kindly recharge your account and try again. Thank you."
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Mouthology

A Professor was traveling by boat. On his way he asked the sailor:
“Do you know Biology, Ecology, Zoology, Geography, physiology?
The sailor said no to all his questions.
Professor: What the hell do you know on earth. You will die of illiteracy.
After a while the boat started sinking. The Sailor asked the Professor, do you know swiminology & escapology from sharkology?
The professor said no.
Sailor: “Well, sharkology & crocodilogy will eat your assology, headology & you will dieology because of your mouthology.
??????
Shared from (Book of Jokes). Download the app here https://play.google.com/store/....apps/details?id=book and brighten your day with a smile.

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Good morning wadau,,missed you so much

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

Happy Madaraka day ,,,ndio kuamka kutoka Sunday ??

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Pauline Njagi

Waaah

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Bravin Wamalwa

amka bna

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Rodgers Odongo

Aya

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

How are you making your articles please? Because am trying but to no avail ?,, it keeps on popping " please check your details" what details???? Someone help

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Musyoki Kitetu
Musyoki Kitetu @Dagoh
2 yrs ·

If my Laptop shows non- system disk error or disk error when trying to start windows, what might be the problem? Please assist me pals it's serious ??

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Yvonne Martha

Following...

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Alex Mwangi

pole aki

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