Am back watu wanguuuuuu

A graduate in Zoology was having difficulties in finding a job...He saw an advert in one of the daily news paper for a job at a Zoo.
At the interview the Manager told him that their Gorilla which has been a tourists attraction has died, so they needed someone to dress as a gorilla since they have not been able to afford a new gorilla.

The graduate was embarrassed ?but since the salary was very ok and attractive,he accepted the job offer ?.On the first day,he put on the gorilla skin and entered the cage, started jumping up and down beating his chest while roaring like a gorilla...?

The next day,he put on the gorilla skin and started moving around the Zoo again and mistakenly entered another cage untill he found himself starting at a lion,the lion roared and started moving towards him?.The scared graduate forgot that he was a gorilla and started shouting like a human being "Help!Help!!Help!!!,"The lion leaped onto him, knocked him to the ground and whispered onto one of his ear; PETER,it's me KELVIN your course mate no fear,?? there's no work in this country....,infact you see that Crocodile down there inside.the water?,it's Micheal your classrep???????

CHEAP BUSINESS WRITERS

FUNCTIONS OF THE NAIROBI STOCK EXCHANGE
Details Category: Business Finance
The basic function of a stock exchange is the raising of funds for investment in long-term assets. While this basic function is extremely important and is the engine through which stock exchanges are driven, there are also other quite important functions.

 1. The mobilization of savings for investment in productive enterprises as an alternative to putting savings in bank deposits, purchase of real estate and outright consumption.

2. The growth of related financial services sector e.g. insurance, pension and provident fund schemes which nature the spirit of savings.

3. The check against flight of capital which takes place because of local inflation and currency depreciation.

4. Encouragement of the divorcement of the owners of capital from the managers of capital; a very important process because owners of capital may not necessarily have the expertise to manage capital investment efficiently.

5. Encouragement of higher standards of accounting, resource management and public disclosure which in turn affords greater efficiency in the process of capital growth.

6. Facilitation of equity financing as opposed to debt financing. Debt financing has been the undoing of many enterprises in both developed and developing countries especially in recessionary periods.

7. Improvement of access to finance for new and smaller companies. This is futuristic in most developing countries because venture capital is mostly unavailable, an unfortunate situation.

8. Encouragement of public floatation of private companies which in turn allows greater growth and increase of the supply of assets available for long term investment.

 There are many other less general benefits which stock exchanges afford to. Individuals, corporate organizations and even the government. The government for example could raise long term finance locally by issuing various types of bond through the stock exchange and thus be less inclined to foreign borrowing.

Stock exchanges, especially in developing countries have not always played the full role in economic development.




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Robbery with violence | #@Markmo

*CRUCIAL INFORMATION FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION*
A lady's handbag which contained her cell phone, credit card, purse etc was stolen.
Thirty minutes later she managed to call her husband from her friend's telephone, telling him what happened.

Her husband said, "I just received your text message asking me to remind u of your ATM pin and I have replied a little while ago".

When they rushed to the bank, the staff told them money had already been withdrawn.

The thief had used the stolen cell phone to text her husband and get hold of her PIN.

Within twenty minutes he (thief) had withdrawn her money from the bank account.

Pls when sensitive information is being asked for through text message, confirm by calling back.

Also, when being texted by friends or family to meet them somewhere, be sure to call back to confirm that the message came from them.

If you do not reach them, be very careful about going places to meet family and friends who text you.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON. You will never know who this might help.

Crime Prevention Unit